2011: The Year in Review

I don't even know where to begin with this year. Hurricane-force chaos mixed with joyful reunions mixed with grief. A dirty martini of a year, or something like that. In any event, it's coming to a close and so I offer a few reflections. As always, it's easy to do this in list form.

 

Best Moments (In No Particular Order)

 

1. Skiing at Tahoe with Howard & the Gang. I will just say that the most constant, most liberating source of joy I have in my life is skiing. This past Winter was absolutely amazing in that regard. Many wonderful moments hanging out at the lodge with Aimee, Jeff, Danny, my brother, whomever. Many spectacular wipeouts as well. This was the year that Jeff and I tried to ski "more "dangerously" – that is, doing jumps and tricks. This, of course, did not work out as planned. As 34/35 year olds we simply had evolved into "chickens."  Made for some deeply entertaining moments. But overall, the ski season of 2011 was a religious experience.

 

2.  Something about terrorizing the Baltimore Inner Harbor Renaissance Hotel with Melissa Rock.

 

3. San Diego/Legoland/Sea World with Howard & Family: Brian and Allison and Roller Coasters and Shamu, and Chicken Fingers in LaJolla. Sheer joy.

 

4. A Picnic in the Park. Before I started my job at Gordon & Rees I decided to take a trip to New York with Jeremy and Howard. Howard demanded we march to the Upper West Side to Zabar's. What ensued was a lox-infused bagel massacre in Central Park. The pepperoni pizza/Korean BBQ double dinner six hours later was also memorable.

 

5. New Orleans. Two separate trips to New Orleans. The first trip was in late April as part of my post-Diepenbrock cross-country tour. Some wonderful meals and nights on the town with Johnny Haff. It was the first time I had been to New Orleans in 7 years and as I left I couldn't help but think about moving back. I feel at home in New Orleans. There is a good memory on every corner.  The second trip was a reunion of sorts with John, John, Trevor, and Jimmy. The memory of eating a roast beef sandwich with Trevor at 5:30am on some street in the back of the FQ will last a lifetime. As will other, more censored moments that will never be published in any medium. All I can say is that I love these guys, and it is wonderful to know that our "bonds of brotherhood" have remained steadfast over all these years. They will be lifelong friends and I am thankful for that.

 

6. Sweet Home Alabama. Trips to Birmingham (Oh you Liz and Van) and Mobile to see Parks and Family. Driving to Mobile I was amazed I had ever lived there. Much less grown up there. Everything seemed so small, so provincial, so…just blah. But after a few hours with Parks driving up and down Old Shell Road all the old feelings of familiarity came back. The feeling of warmth – this was still a place where people knew me, where I had loved ones. It was never about the dumb Waffle House – it was always about the people. And I am glad I was able to see the Haffner's, the Moore's, the Coleman's, T-Boz, and all the wonderful goyim of the Azalea City.

 

7. Mendocino and Jenner and the California Coast.

 

8. Atlanta. Many many trips to Atlanta. Braves games and holiday meals and new restaurants and bad French restaurants. My parents' basement and Howard's basement….good times. Now if only……….

 

9. Half Moon Bay with Mom & Dad. Two days of golf on the California Coast and fish dinners along the ocean.

 

10. Vodka Shots with Mr. Roll. In a 6-hour visit with Jan we somehow managed to drink half a bottle of Cherry Vodka….I expect nothing less.

 

11. Matthew and Elissa's Memorial Day Wedding. The chaos of April/May (see below) ended with a gorgeous wedding in the Sacramento River Delta. Matthew and Elissa finally tied the knot. I had the honor of being the Best Man – and probably gave the best toast/speech of my life. It was truly a wonderful celebration and one of the most intimate weddings I have ever attended. A model wedding.

 

The Chaotic

 

1.  Rochelle. What more can I say? I still think about her every single day. Her death was at once totally unbelievable and altogether expected. How do you stop a freight train heading for disaster? I tried. I couldn't. No one could. She was that type of person. But she was beautiful and she was funny and selfless. And I will always cherish her memory. Rochelle was cremated and her ashes are (rightfully) at her father's house. He told me he was going to take them to Paris and throw them in the Seine….Rochelle always wanted to go to Paris. I love this idea, but I also need a place to visit Rochelle. Call me old-fashioned – call me Jewish. So I had a memorial plaque installed in her honor at the Sacramento Zoo near the lion cages. Yup. Rochie loved the lions, and she loved animals, and we had some moments there….so come 2012 there will be a place to talk to her. Which I need.

 

2. A Quiet Drink in Berkeley.  By December 2010 it had become apparent that Diepenbrock Harrison would implode and with this knowledge came a race to find a new job. Would I join Jeff's law firm? Would I join Larry at Gordon & Rees to continue my foray into health care? What would happen? The months that followed became an exercise in "keeping it together." In the end – which occurred in early April – I chose to follow Larry. As things evolved it was clear it was the only logical option. But it was bittersweet. Saying goodbye to a Firm and a Family I had know for seven years was traumatic. On my final day Gilberto and I packed up my office and unloaded all the files, books, and trinkets at my house. From there I sped off to San Francisco for Matthew's bachelor party.  At the same time Jeff was driving back to Sacramento from Oakland. That morning he had given notice to Diepenbrock that he would be leaving to start Pioneer. We decided to meet at the Berkeley Pier for one drink. We found a sushi restaurant, and had some Japanese beer and some sashimi. It was the end of an era. From here on out, our (Jeff, me, Joel) trajectories would split off.

 

3. The New Digs. [Censored]

4. DC and Me.  "Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end." The September trip was a journey to the last beginning's end. I won't soon forget Sammy and Jana's smiling faces nor Jeremy and I's trip to the ballpark, nor a lot of pleasant faces and sensations that had unfortunately become unfamiliar.  All that you can't leave behind.

 

Concluding Thoughts

 

New Beginnings – a Renewal of old Connections – Grief – Starting Over. It all happened in 2011. It was trying. And as always, I got through it all with a little help from my friends. And the rock that is my beloved family.

 

Onward to 2012.